Pop Culture Nerd Alert/If You Like That, Then Try This

Disclaimer: Yes, I am a nerd. I’ve always been a pop-culture, TV show loving nerd and I’m okay with that.

Yeah, I know, shocker, huh?

Now that I’m out the closet, time to get my nerd on with some TV show “if you like that, then try this”.

VOYAGERS! (NBC 1982-83)—Compare to DOCTOR WHO, THE GREATEST AMERICAN HERO (Kinda-Sorta, I’ll explain later)
Adventure series starring the late Jon-Erik Hexum and Meeno Puluse.  When Time Traveler Phineas Bogg (Hexum) accidentally crashes in Jeffery Jones (Puluse) bedroom the two team up to, as Bogg would say in the intro of each episode;

We travel through time to help history along. Give it a push when it’s needed. When the Omni’s Red it means history’s wrong. Our job is to get everything back on track“.

Each episode would find the two landing in random points in time, using the Omni, a time traveling device, and correcting whatever problem that cause the Omni to flash red.  Once it was green again, they were off to the next adventure.  This series borrowed tremendously from DOCTOR WHO (especially with The Omni, that usually looked like a pocket watch but could, like The TARDIS, could be disguised to fit in its surroundings) and was possibly an inspiration for QUANTUM LEAP (Each Omni was either fixed so they could either go to a certain point in time, Bogg’s was fixed so it could only go as far as 1970, for example.  Quantum Leap’s time traveler Sam Beckett time-traveling was only limited to when he was born to the year 1999, with a rare instance when he time-leaped into the body of one of his desendents during the American Civil War…hey, I told you, I’m a TV show nerd like that).

The tie-in to the 80s superhero classic, THE GREATEST AMERICAN HERO?  Both show’s main characters had to operate without their instruction manuals.  On The Greatest…Ralph Hinkley wears this alien unitard that gives him all kinds of wonderful powers and a sort of instruction guide that Ralph loses in the first episode and thus he has to learn how to use the suit the hard way…hijinks ensue.  On Voyagers!  Bogg and all other Voyagers carry a Guidebook, a glorified history book, that tells them the way time should be if they need to correct…well, that was explained earlier.  His Guidebook is taken from him by Jeffrey’s dog, Ralph, which happens to be the first name of the main character on TGAM.

Voyagers! was created by James D. Parriott, who would go on to create numerous TV shows, most notably cult classics MISFITS OF SCIENCE and FOREVER KNIGHT.  I loved those shows, man!

Puluse’s half-sister, Soliel Moon-Frye, had a somewhat better run on NBC (and later in syndication) in the kid friendly comedy, PUNKY BREWSTER.

CHECK THIS OUT:

Voyagers! Opening theme

'A History Of Violence' was a bad choice to watch with the Mother-In-Law

Didn’t even think about there being any sex scenes in the movie at all until…OMG…right there in color, Viggo and Maria going to town, baby

It was a bad movie to watch with my mother-in-law. Oh, don’t get me wrong, it was a great flick but I wasn’t expecting too much except some good old American violence. Bang Bang!

Didn’t even think about there being any sex scenes in the movie at all until…OMG…right there in color, Viggo and Maria going to town, baby! Not once but twice and the second time wasn’t quite as nice! The look on my mother-in-law’s face was Mastercard PRICELESS. The look on The Missus face, not so much.

After the movie ended and Moms went home, we had a little talk:

The Missus: Why didn’t you tell me that there was going to be that kind of sex in the movie?

Me: I didn’t know!

The Missus: It was just so…graphic.

Me: Um…did it turn you on? Because, well, we got some stairs and…

The Missus: Huh? You! Men!

Me: Whut???

The Missus: Always thinking about sex!

Me: Well, for the record, I wasn’t thinking about sex when we were watching the movie. I was totally disgusted by that stuff! Wanna watch it again?

The Missus: Perv! Okay, I’ll be there in a minute, I’m going to change into something more….comfortable.

Me: (switching to bad Barry White voice): Oh, baby!

Thanks Viggo and Maria. Bad beginnning, happy ending. The American Way.

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Three overplayed songs I love anyway

Between The Sheets by The Isley Brothers

I love the song because it’s so smooth and it’s a nice throwback to a time where you could be “dirty” without being “vulgar”. It’s sensual without being blunt and whooping you upside the head with graphic details as to how you want to make love.

And it doesn’t sound like the woman in question is going to be tossed aside afterwards like a empty bottle of Colt 45.

Jump Around by House Of Pain

This is like the Perfect Storm of a song. The classic sample, the tight lyrics that both fit the vibe, are rough and funny all at the same time. If anything, it’s gotten better as the years go by. It’s become timeless in the fact that everybody stops what they’re doing for minute and start “serving yo’ ass like John McEnroe” for about three minutes.

Jump Around!

Jump Around!

Jump Around!

Jump up!

Jump up and get down!

Jump!

Jump!

Jump!

Everybody Jump!

What’s Going On? by Marvin Gaye

Mother, mother

There’s too many of you crying

Brother, brother, brother

There’s far too many of you dying

You know we’ve got to find a way

To bring some lovin’ here today

The more things change, the more they stay the same. Things that were troubling people back when this song was first released in the early 70s is still relevant almost 40 years later.

Father, father

We don’t need to escalate

You see, war is not the answer

For only love can conquer hate

You know we’ve got to find a way

To bring some lovin’ here today

Like Stevie would say a few years later in almost a companion piece to this classic; Love’s in need of Love today…it was true then, it’s just as true now.

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She’s Just Had A Kid & She’s Getting A Divorce…

I guess that there is some kind of divorce stuff going on with Christina Milian and her soon to be ex, The Dream.  He don’t want to be with her no mo’, he cheated on her, she sucks as an American  or something to that effect.

Let me tell you something…SOME things are worth fighting for. I don’t know how crazy she may be or how mean, but I would be trying to resolve our issues.

The Milian Bend

Um, she's flex-able...work that man right out of your system, gurl...

Oh my.country.tis.o.thee

Dream, you sir, are a fool.

Before I go on, allow me to get this out of my system:

hooooh…aiiieeeeeee…She looks f*cking fantastic! A-F*CKING-MEN…
this heffa is making me moist all up in the mouth…hamamna…Mary, Sweet mother of Jesus on the main line, TELL EM WHAT YOU WANT…OOOH CALL EM UP AND TELL EM WHAT YOU WANNNNNNT!

Thank you.

You know that saying, “for every good looking woman, there’s a man out there that’s tired of f*ckin’ her”? Well, I ain’t f*cked her so I ain’t tired of her. If I ever get that tired, I will go take a nap.

Oh, hush up, Aunt Gladys!

Oh, I know what some of you will think; “Look at that dirty old man, lusting”…
You got d*mn right I’m lustin’, just like any red-blooded heterosexual (and a few gay) men would if they came across Christina stretching and flexin’ for cameras in the park like that.  As far as publicity stunts go, my compliments to the chef.

I can also hear the jeers from the young “brothas” out there:

Young & Dumb“Yo, old man, you just don’t understand…”

You right I don’t understand and I never want to understand that s*it.  A woman that flexible, that thick, that buttery?

Like I said earlier, I don’t know what her problem is, nor do I understand what kind of issues that he has but I would be like Moses, wandering in the desert 40 years, trying to figure it out.

Ah, youth is wasted on the wrong people!”

I’m hip, Grandpa, I heard that.

(ironically enough, The Dream is 41, I don’t know why he acting like he’s gonna have a Sinatra-type career and will be working Vegas in the year 2052 because the odds are very good that we won’t even remember that he even had a career in five years unless Amazon.com has one of those 5 mp3s for a buck sales and one of his tracks in the cyber buck bin, nevermind that he was once married to a fine specimen of “womanity” (my word, I just made it up, if Sarah Palin can make up words, so can I) like Christina Milian.

CHECK IT OUT:

The rest of the Milian “spread”

Christina Milian’s US AGAINST THE WORLD

Stevie Wonder’s cover of The Beatles WE CAN WORK IT OUT