Scandal: Dirty Little Secrets (Ep. 2) RT (Random Thoughts)

  • The client of the week is a High Class Call Girl Madam.
  • Turns out that White Himbo Lawyer Finch was one of the Madam’s clients.  Men. 
  • High Strung Lawyer, Abby is really annoyed that Finch went out and bought some pussy (and I’m sure she’s mad that he didn’t hit her up for some…she would have gave him a 100% discount) and she spends most of the episode pissed about it.  Get over it, girl.
  • Why is the music so loud and constant.  Make it stop, Mommy!
  • That Stevie Wonder song doesn’t fit in that scene.
  • Oh, finally, a fat person sighting (the White House security guard…well, he’s more husky than fat)
  • The New Girl is so Merideth Grey that she’s already in need of a good slap
  • Of course a Supreme Court nominee is on high class call girl client list.
  • Okay, Olivia Pope, you told the President, who is your lover, right hand man, Cyrus, that you’re representing his pregnant jump-off and you’re SHOCKED that your access to the White House has been cut off?  You think your poonanny that good?
  • Cyrus tells Olivia that she knows why she’s been denied access to the White House.  Good somebody isn’t acting stupid.
  • Gideon Wallace, the worst news reporter in DC obviously, has been found out by Merideth, Jr. in like three seconds.  Yeah, he sucks.
  • Olivia and Merideth, Jr. go to the Prez’s Preggo Jump-Off’s house and, of course she’s not happy to see Olivia, seeing that Olivia checked her so hard in the previous episode, that ol’ girl tried to kill herself.  Jump-Off makes Olivia say she was right about the President and tells her to kick rocks.  But she’ll be back because Olivia knows her shit, why she has to tell Merideth, Jr. this, I dunno.  Shut up, hoe, you work for me, mofo!
  • The DC Madam has been arrested and the Supreme Court nominee, his wife and the White House Chief Of Staff arrive to get Olivia to save his ass.
  • The Supreme Court nominee gets on his high horse and tells everybody he didn’t sleep with a hooker.  The plot hole, big enough to drive a truck through, tells me that no, you did sleep with a hooker, Judge, because you didn’t know your wifey was a hooker back in the day.  So the Judge made a ho a housewife, unknowingly.
  • The Callgirl/Judge’s wife really loves him.  No diggity.
  • Olivia keeps making lovesick eyes at the President.  She is so sprung.
  • I want to kiss Olivia Pope.
  • President Grant wants to kiss Olivia, too.
  • They settle for a clandestine finger touch.  I’ll take it, too, Olivia.
  • Olivia calls for her black Himbo Lawyer, Harrison, and he goes off and rounds up the johns off the high class madam’s list to the tune of Otis Redding’s Mr. Pitiful.  That song fits the scene!
  • President Grant tells Cyrus that Olivia is the love of his life.  He’s so sprung.
  • Hey, what do you know, the Jump Off calls Merideth, Jr. and they meet up.  Merideth, Jr. makes it all about her, Merideth, Sr. style. Well, seems like Merideth, Jr. has some skeletons in her closet.  Hmm, Stevie Wonder’s Skeletons’ would have been good background music.
  • The episode closes with Gideon Wallace, showing up at Olivia’s office, seeing Merideth, Jr. and the Jump Off, just randomly standing around.  He puts 2 and 2 together, where he was blind, now he has a story!  He still sucks at reporting, though, Hell, even…um Stevie Wonder could have figured that scenario out.  P.S. Olivia, get some fucking security for your office!  You can’t have asshole all up in your biz like that, woman!
  • I give the episode a 3.5 stars out of 5.
  • I give Olivia’s lips a solid 4 out of 5.
  • I give Merideth, Jr. the side eye.

Ebony & Ivory (Stevie Wonder & Frank Sinatra) 1982

Frank Sinatra: “You are black, and I am white
Life’s an Eskimo Pie, let’s.. take a bite!
That was groovy thinkin’
Lincoln, when you set them freeeeeee…

We all know
Cats are the same
Maine to Mexico.
Good. Bad.
Guys and chicks!”

Stevie Wonder: “I am dark, and you are light.”

Frank Sinatra: “You are blind as a bat, and I have sight!
Side by side, you are my amigo,
Negro, let’s not fiiiiiiiight!”

Stevie Wonder: “Ebony, ivory
Living in perfect harmony.”

Frank Sinatra: “Salt and pepper,
Sammy and Dean
Stevie and me are peachy keen!”

Stevie Wonder: “You are white.”

Frank Sinatra: “You are black – and who cares!”

Who cares, baby!